A Closer Look at Prostate Play: How, Why, and Where to Start

Let’s get one thing straight: exploring prostate play isn’t weird, it isn’t “too out there,” and it definitely isn’t something to be ashamed of. In fact, more and more men—whether flying solo or enjoying it with a partner—are getting curious about what’s often called the male G-spot. And once they try it? Most wonder why they didn’t start sooner.  

At Lovedo, we believe pleasure should never come with shame, especially when it’s about understanding your own body better. Prostate stimulation can unlock a whole new world of sensation—deeper, fuller, sometimes even hands-free orgasms that feel very different (and often far more intense) than anything you get from standard stroking. That’s not hype—it’s biology.

But we also get it: trying something new back there can feel intimidating, especially with all the myths and awkwardness that tend to surround anal play for men.

That’s why we’re here.

This guide breaks it all down—no medical jargon, no judgement. Just straight-talking advice about what the prostate is, why it feels so good, how to get started, and which toys can help you ease in with confidence. Whether you’re nervously curious, happily partnered, or just looking to try something new that actually lives up to the hype, this one’s for you.

Let’s take a closer look at prostate play—how it works, why men love it, and how to try it safely, pleasurably, and confidently.

What Is the Prostate (and Why It Feels So Good)?

The prostate is a small, walnut-sized gland located just inside the male body, a couple of inches in from the anus. Its main job is to help produce semen—but when it comes to pleasure, it’s got a bit of a secret talent. Known as the male G-spot (or P-spot, if you’re being technical), this little gland is packed with nerve endings—and when stimulated the right way, it can deliver some seriously intense sensations.

Think of it like this: while most men are used to stimulation on the outside—via the penis—the prostate is an internal pleasure zone that offers something totally different. It can create deep, full-body pleasure that builds differently to a regular orgasm. Some describe it as a more “whole-body” feeling, while others say it’s like having an orgasm from the inside out. And yes, some men even experience hands-free orgasms purely from prostate stimulation alone.

So why does it feel so good? It’s all about the nerves. The prostate is surrounded by sensitive tissue and is closely linked to the pelvic floor, which plays a big role in sexual function. Stimulating it—gently and gradually—can awaken all sorts of sensations you might not have realised were possible. And for those who enjoy both internal and external stimulation at the same time? That combo can lead to next-level orgasms.

Still unsure? That’s totally normal. The idea of prostate play can feel a bit taboo, but once you understand the anatomy and the pleasure potential, it starts to make a whole lot of sense. It’s not about labels or expectations—it’s about curiosity, confidence, and exploring your body in a new way.

Myths, Fears, and Stigma (Let’s Clear the Air)

Let’s be honest—prostate play comes with a lot of baggage. For years, it’s been surrounded by awkward jokes, outdated ideas, and plenty of misinformation. So if you're curious but feeling unsure, you’re definitely not alone. Let’s break down some of the most common myths that stop people from giving it a go.

“Isn’t it just for gay men?”

Nope. Not even close. Your prostate doesn’t care about your sexuality—it’s simply a part of your anatomy. Prostate stimulation is about pleasure, not identity. Whether you're straight, bi, gay or somewhere in between, enjoying something that feels good doesn’t “mean” anything beyond the fact that… well, it feels good.

“Won’t it hurt?”

Not if you go slow and use plenty of lube. Pain usually comes from rushing, tensing up, or using something too big too soon. The key to enjoying anal or P-spot play is to relax, listen to your body, and start small. A beginner-friendly toy, like a slim plug or massager, plus a generous helping of water-based lube, makes all the difference.

“Is it dirty or unhygienic?”

This is a common worry—but the reality is, with basic hygiene, it’s totally clean and safe. A quick wash beforehand, a shower if that helps you feel more confident, and a toy that’s easy to clean will keep things simple. And don’t worry—anal play doesn’t have to be messy if you’re prepared.

“What if I like it… too much?”

Honestly? That’s kind of the point. Pleasure shouldn’t come with guilt or overthinking. Exploring new sensations doesn’t change who you are—it just means you’re confident enough to learn what your body really enjoys.

So if you’ve been holding back because of old-school stigma or stuff you’ve heard in the locker room—forget it. Prostate play is normal, safe, and incredibly enjoyable when approached with the right mindset (and the right lube).

Getting Started: What You Actually Need

If you’re ready to explore prostate play for the first time, the good news is you don’t need a drawer full of gear to get started—just a few essential items and the right mindset.

1. A Good Quality Lubricant

This is non-negotiable. The anus doesn’t self-lubricate like other parts of the body, so you’ll need something smooth, safe, and long-lasting. We recommend a generous amount of water-based anal lube, especially for beginners. You might also consider a relaxing anal gel, like the one from Nexus—designed to help ease tension and make entry more comfortable.

2. A Beginner-Friendly Toy

For first-timers, small is key. A slim silicone butt plug, a curved prostate massager, or even a soft, flexible training plug is ideal. Look for something smooth, body-safe, and with a flared base (that’s important—it stops the toy from going too far). If you're curious but nervous, start with a smaller plug and get used to the sensation before moving onto internal movement or vibration.

Some toys are designed specifically for the P-spot, with a slight curve or angled tip to press gently against the prostate once inserted. These can really enhance the experience once you're comfortable.

3. Privacy, Relaxation, and Time

You’re not on a timer here. The best prostate play happens when you're relaxed—physically and mentally. Whether it’s a quiet evening alone or some partner play, give yourself time to explore without pressure. A warm shower beforehand, dim lighting, and a bit of breathing space go a long way.

Remember, this is about discovery, not performance. There’s no right or wrong—just what feels good for you. With the right lube, a gentle toy, and a little curiosity, you're well on your way to unlocking something seriously satisfying.

First-Time Tips: How to Try It Without Freaking Out

We get it—trying prostate play for the first time can feel like a big deal. You might be excited, curious, or even a little freaked out (totally normal, by the way). But the good news is, with the right approach, it can be a genuinely enjoyable and eye-opening experience.

1. Go Slow (Slower Than You Think)

Seriously—this is the golden rule. Whether you’re using a finger, a butt plug, or a prostate massager, take your time. Rushing leads to tension, and tension leads to discomfort. Start by applying lube generously—on both the toy and yourself—and ease in gently. Let your body adjust at its own pace.

2. Relaxation Is Everything

Your mindset matters just as much as the gear. Try a warm shower, deep breathing, or even some solo stimulation beforehand to help you relax. The more at ease you are, the better the experience. Remember: this is about pleasure, not pressure.

3. Start Small and Simple

Stick with beginner toys that are slim, soft, and easy to control. Many first-timers find a small silicone plug or curved massager works well. Insert slowly, stop whenever you want, and focus on how it feels—not just where it’s going.

4. Explore Movement and Pressure

Once the toy is in and you're comfortable, you can start to gently rock it, clench your pelvic muscles, or pair it with external stimulation. Some people enjoy keeping the toy still and just focusing on the internal pressure. Others like subtle motion. There’s no single right way—just what feels good.

5. Communicate (If You’re With a Partner)

If you're trying prostate stimulation with a partner, communication is everything. Check in, use plenty of lube, and keep things relaxed and playful. It’s not a race—it’s an experience to enjoy together.

No need to overthink it. Like anything new, the first time is about learning, not perfection. Listen to your body, go slow, and you might just discover a new favourite kind of pleasure.

Best Toys for Prostate Beginners (And How to Use Them)

When it comes to prostate play, the right toy can make all the difference—especially when you’re just starting out. The key is choosing something that’s comfortable, body-safe, and designed for beginners. No monster plugs, no intimidation—just smooth, well-shaped tools to help you discover what feels good.

1. Slim Silicone Butt Plugs

These are the perfect entry point (literally). A soft silicone butt plug with a slim neck and flared base is ideal for getting used to the sensation of internal play. The tapered shape makes insertion gentle and gradual, and once it’s in, you can leave it there and focus on how it feels. Whether you’re wearing it during solo time or foreplay, it helps your body adjust and opens the door for more advanced stimulation later.

2. Metal Butt Plugs (with a Bit of Weight)

Feeling a bit more confident? Stainless steel or aluminium plugs offer a different kind of pleasure. The weight creates a constant, satisfying pressure that some people absolutely love. Plus, they look great and hold temperature—meaning you can warm them slightly (or cool them down) for extra sensation. Just remember: go for a small to medium size to begin with, and still use plenty of lube.

3. Curved Prostate Massagers

Unlike plugs, prostate massagers are designed to stimulate the P-spot directly. Their curved shape means they naturally press against the prostate once inserted. Some are static, while others have handles or vibrations for added effect. If you're curious about exploring hands-free orgasms or that “full-body” internal pleasure, a beginner-friendly massager is a great next step.

Look for one made from smooth silicone, with a narrow tip and a flexible body. The Rocks Off O-Boy 7, for example, is compact, comfortable, and designed with beginners in mind. Vibration isn’t a must, but it can really enhance the experience once you’re confident.

Still unsure where to start? Think simple, small, and soft. You don’t need anything wild to have a good time—just the right shape, the right lube, and a bit of curiosity.

Building Confidence and Exploring More

Once you’ve dipped your toe (or, well... something else) into prostate play, you might find yourself wanting to explore a little further—and that’s where the real fun begins. Like anything sexual, confidence builds with experience, and the more you get to know your body, the more in control (and turned on) you’ll feel.

Try Longer Sessions

Your first few tries might be short and sweet—and that’s totally fine. But as your comfort grows, you might start to enjoy longer sessions of internal play. Some people love combining P-spot stimulation with deep breathing, edging, or even using a vibrator externally at the same time. There’s no pressure to “achieve” anything—just stay tuned in to what feels good.

Explore Vibration

Ready to level up? Vibrating prostate massagers add a whole new dimension to pleasure. Gentle rumbles or focused pulses can send waves of sensation through your body, especially when they’re aimed directly at the prostate. Just make sure you’re already comfortable with basic toys before jumping in—it’ll make the transition way more enjoyable.

Play With a Partner

Once you’ve explored solo, some people love inviting their partner into the experience. It can be incredibly intimate, especially when there's trust, communication, and shared curiosity involved. Let them use the toy on you, explore touch, or even try some rimming or teasing beforehand to build arousal. Just remember to take it slow, and keep the focus on what feels good for you both.

Aftercare and Cleaning Matter

Once you're done, make sure to clean your toys with a proper toy cleaner or warm soapy water. Give yourself time to relax after a session—especially after a big orgasm or a new experience. Feeling tender or emotional is totally normal. Prostate play, when done right, is just as much about care and confidence as it is about sensation.

There’s no rush. Trust your body, explore at your own pace, and enjoy the ride. Pleasure is personal—and prostate play is just one more way to make it even better.

Final Thoughts

If there’s one thing we hope you take away from this guide, it’s this: prostate play is nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s not weird, it’s not “too advanced,” and it’s definitely not just for certain types of people. It’s for anyone with a prostate—and a bit of curiosity.

At Lovedo, we believe that real sexual confidence comes from knowing what turns you on, exploring your body without shame, and being open to new kinds of pleasure. Prostate stimulation just happens to be one of the most underrated ways to unlock next-level orgasms, deeper connection, and a stronger understanding of your own body.

Yes, it might feel unfamiliar at first. You might have questions. You might even have a few hang-ups left over from outdated ideas. That’s okay. What matters is that you’re open enough to learn, to listen to your body, and to try something new on your terms.

Whether you’re starting with a small butt plug, easing into things with a relaxing gel, or going all-in with a prostate massager, your experience is yours to shape. And if you’re exploring with a partner, even better—shared pleasure is one of the best ways to grow closer, trust more, and laugh a little along the way.

So don’t overthink it. Start slow. Breathe. Use good lube. Be patient. And most importantly—enjoy it.

Because when it comes to sex, the best experiences are the ones that feel good for you.